Toddler hitting at daycare reddit. It's high time the teachers do more.

One little girl told her mom she doesn’t want to come anymore because my son hurts her which is absolutely heartbreaking. 21 votes, 15 comments. As a result of the daycare owner not doing anything, the daycare eventually lost their license and I’m still learning (like most of us!) but my 22month old toddler has a tantrum every day when he gets home from daycare. I used to work at a Children's center/daycare. The dentist said that may cause him to We notice it more when our 8 month old is getting attention and we have to scold the 2. For eg. 5. Either way, the daycare should have a plan to deal with it. Usually this is in his changing table, so I gently place him in his crib with a few books and offer “quiet time. (1) teach replacement behaviors (“instead of hitting, let’s use kind hands and feet” and demonstrate what that looks like, like gently tapping on the shoulder or waving hello instead of shoving (2) implement a reward system (“if you use kind hands and feet the whole time we are at the park today This is normal for a 2 year old. 5 years old and has been in daycare since the end of January 2021. The 2 hours may be state or county required, but ask if there's a way he can "rest" for an age appropriate time. We read him the books every night, get him to repeat the sacred mantra “teeth are not for biting” multiple times a day, role play Dec 16, 2018 · Gently move their arm away from whomever your toddler is hitting and say “hitting hurts, I won’t let you hit”. Usually children are able to form a secure attachment with their nursery teachers as well after a period of time. Slipped on the tile, ran into a pole at daycare, stood up under a table and hit a support arm. It only started happening at home a week ago when we visited our Kids that age are meant to get 2 to 4 hours of vigorous exercise per day, that means outside or at a gym (not enough space to run around inside). They were extremely strict on having to write detailed reports about what went on during the day (good, and bad behaviors the kids had). So my three year old boy is perfect and wonderful - which is why this is that much harder for me as I have a hard time accepting/believing that his behavior is not “normal” or that there is something seriously wrong with him. They never complained a single day about going. Two of which were totally unprovoked. We also stressed using gentle hands and still use that language for everything. A toddler may understand rules about not hitting, but struggle to stop themself from hitting or biting when they're feeling frustrated. We've tried time outs. He does do it to me when he’s tantruming at home, but not all the time - maybe once every week or two at the most. Autistic child at daycare hitting our daughter. No hit Mommy” and a flick on the hand, enough to sting a little, followed by hugs, helps them understand. “hitting hurts”. Daycare observes toddler biting others and intentionally hitting head/falling on ground. You can provide enrichment in other ways like library, play groups, parks, etc without your toddler being in a day care class my opinion. Hi all, my three year old has had a few hitting incidents at daycare. I use to go into work daily ( toddler teacher) and I would always call the toddler rooms daycare fight club. The mother beat the teacher. Charges were pressed, and the person was arrested. He knows the quiet time isn’t always after a hitting incident so it’s not associated with a punishment. However, some kids just won’t take one. I’m a FTM and got a report that my 2. ADMIN MOD. When I ask him what happened, he says it was because the boy had a toy that he wanted. So when he hits my face I just stand up and tell him no hitting. May 16, 2023 · How To Stop Your Toddler From Hitting. He hits me and Dad all of the time while playing. Some days are better than others, but I’m not sure where to go from here. Sensory biting- biting because it fits the sensory need. Any advice is welcome! Gentle parenting doesn’t mean you can’t set boundaries. Yesterday our daycare provider told us that our almost 3 year old son has been hurting his friends at daycare. Please read Call to action - renewed protests starting on July 1st and new posts at r/ModCord or r/Save3rdPartyApps for up-to-date information. I’ll give a little back story to help better under this situation. I noticed a child who is older than my son pushing and aggressively taking toys from all the kids. Because that’s what it is. 5 yr old has been hitting other kids in the face at daycare. The tantrums, defiance, routine changes are enormous at this point. The teachers (and us) inform him of the consequences (taking things away or barring participation) and he seems to get it, but the lesson doesn't stick longer than an hour, and Just wanted some advise on how we can help our little girl stop hurting another child at daycare :-(. However, this occurred quite frequently with my son as he is the smallest and youngest child in the room. Physically stop the hitting of you need to (blocking her, gently holding her hand/s , moving her away from the other person) Coregulate- this depends a lot on what works to calm her down- it might be sitting together in silence, it might be sitting together listening to her, going for a walk or another physical outlet. " This is advice for much younger toddler/babies. Just a short story of what's going on We are a military family that moved overseas in February. It’s probably that your child is a bit nervous, but can tell you’re really nervous, so she cries because of the feedback loop. I would use the methods in this free online video course taught by a behavior expert. Our little one who is 2 has been targeting a boy everyday she is a daycare, the boy is smaller and younger. This takes at least one set of eyes off the kids for 30 minutes every 2 hours and occasionally in between. They know you are a safe person and they are let their emotions out. Daycare & Other Childcare. The ability to control those impulses may not fully develop until they're close to 4 years old, with support from loving parents and caregivers. We were able to reduce bitting by reading books. It's high time the teachers do more. It’s been four days in a row now going back to last week (and a week before that, it was every day). He doesn't have siblings at home who hit and we never model that behavior ourselves. We’ve tried big little My kid, little boy at 2 1/2 years old, JUST got kicked out of one of his classes bc of biting. A firm, “No. It’s something that takes time and alot of repetition. When you put kiddo in his room to calm down, he isn't actually calming himself; he's just exhausting himself. At his daycare (and at home, though not nearly as often) he will repeatedly kick, scratch, hit, or throw things at people, even immediately after being told to stop. We had a child who was biting in the group for a bit. Your logic destroys their argument. I get alot of "we have to teach them that hands aren't for hitting. Toddler hitting My 2 year old (almost 3) recently starting hitting me and pinching me when she is upset. hi i recently started working at a daycare. Mainly coincided with him starting daycare and being in a room with another child hitting the other kids. They are learning boundaries, discipline, emotions, testing patience, limits etc. 5 year old daughter is displaying at daycare and a lot of it seems like it is for no reason. We've tried redirecting him to do an appropriate behavior like a wave or high five instead. It’s EVERY single day. Daycare let us know today that it seemed to be happening frequently this week. If a parents come to pick up, attention goes to the parents, especially if they are having to discuss incidents and behavior for multiple kids. They had been at their previous daycare for over 2 years and absolutely loved it. Once we moved we found a daycare that came recommended by quite a few people. It seems at daycare, though, that she is hitting for no reason. Lately the one 4 year old that has autism has been hitting the other children. She wanted a toy or something that someone else has so she bit (doesn’t have the words to express what she wants). My daughter is… Separation anxiety is developmentally expected at that age. The daycare staff are amazing at communicating changes to us and they said this is the first time its happened there. We worked a TON on emotional communication. A couple of ideas that might help. First hitting incident- this happened about a month or so ago. You should not hold up your daycare as some kind of example of a good place to trust kids with. My pediatrician told me they aren’t strong enough to do any actual damage beyond superficial bruising. See full list on parentalquestions. When kiddo gets angry, his 'fight or flight i work at a daycare and one of the kids won’t stop hitting me. Toddler hitting. It's music to my ears hearing a teacher trying to justify hitting children you'd be a perfect 1920s teacher! Any time he hit me I wouldn’t respond. According to his teacher, my son has been randomly going up to classmates and hitting them unprovoked. They have such big feeling in their little bodies!! 13 votes, 10 comments. Or he may have sensory/ other issues. Its horrific. The kinds of bruises a biting toddler can leave on other toddlers are scary. She's been at a daycare (actually 2 nannies working together) since she was just under 4 months old, and it's been mostly going well. They do a good job at talking to him about gentle hands and he understands and stops when the classmate says stop/they don’t like that. ”. Now that my son is 18 months old, he has been moved into the toddler room. I’m kind of surprised he does it at daycare and not at home though. We are both shift workers in “essential services” so both our boys started daycare at age 1. Dunno if this would work with a kid who is aggressive and enjoys contact. 5 YO for something. Posted by u/Ok-Temperature6003 - 3 votes and no comments Toddlers are too young to activate self-regulation strategies on their own. When it comes to hurting others, children DO understand simple, kind, firm physical discipline. He does it after he has done something "bad" and his mother calls him over to discipline him. Biting is often a response to stress, and so the key thing is working out what the triggers are for your kid so that you can work with their next daycare on that. g. 5, developmentally, they still need a nap. So I actually did the head banging on the floor as a toddler and so did my 3 year old. It waxes and wanesnow it progressed to where he went up to a girl in a tot I work with children who exhibit challenging behaviors. We also practice being gentle and “ nice” with the cat, dollies etc. You cannot make assumptions / say hitting the child was justified when you have zero knowledge on the situation. Example: He jumped on my legs while playing, I yelled "Augh", she (in the other room) yelled in a very angry tone to come over to her so she could discipline him. I had the same daunting conversations with daycare and his teachers and it is so heartbreaking as a parent to go through. They thought maybe he was bored and he was bigger than all of the children so they moved him to a bigger class. We have 2 boys, 2. Open menu Open navigation Go to Reddit Home Put down the bag, give ONE hug and kiss, hand the child to an adult, and get out quickly. Toddler pushing older kids and hitting me Hi, my daughter is 16 months old, very dynamic and tall for her age. This got him to stop for a while. I don’t mean on purpose, but it seems like every few days our kid has hit his head on something. Scenario: She wants to put on her princess dress in the morning when we are trying to get out the door to get big sis to preschool and doesn’t like that I said “later”. 5) started pushing other kids about 5 months or so ago (started over toy sharing). I got some great advice and have been working hard on his behavior. The advice never seems age appropriate. Original post- My kid was hit at her school by her teacher- twice My daughter is almost 3 year old. He continues to do it at drop offs. What works with my 2. “When you ready to stop hitting, then call my name. It’s really hard to handle in the classroom because disruptive behavior can wake up the other kids who are still napping daily. com Something similar happened to my cousin’s child except the owner didn’t fire the employee and tried to convince my cousin to not do anything. Wish me luck! 2. Daycare says he does it like a fun game. ) I then say, "So why would you hit daddy or anyone else? . but their educators, (as well as their parents) really should take responsibility. We thought she may be jealous of the younger kids who still have bottles, so we brought her own milk that she can have. He also does it if he’s adamant about something that we’re telling him no to. So why do people think a 3yo should sit on their mat silently for 2-3hrs while others nap. Good luck to you! I firmly believe that most of these types of incidents are indicative of a daycare that is not working for your child - not your toddler having a behavior issue. Lost sleep, bought a million books, asked all my friends for advice … it was just a phase. When little ones hit, take their hand and say "you can touch me softly, like this. When my daughter first moved up to the 2 year old room, it was full of bigger toddlers who were faster and more assertive. Two year olds are still very impulsive and will bail on language skills if they find something that works faster and easier, i. I had to move to be closer to family, which definitely has helped with family help since he has a sister Here are the facts we know of. We've tried ignoring it. Once he hits, we've tried saying "no" firmly. Help! 4 year old son has been kicked out of daycare. Then follow through if he tries to hit again. Where did they learn that? Why are they hitting? And how can I make this stop? Toddler is hitting. She told me the other day that her friend got mad and she hit them, and later said her friend hit her. They want to be held and demand to be held but they also want to continue hitting the person who said “no” to them. My youngest is 18 months. 5 was when my LO got better about not hitting the cats. My daughter pushed a child at daycare and that child’s parent saw it and complained. We are in a 24-30 month room and my son is 27 months. But gentle parenting doesn’t mean your child gets away with hurting others. My kid only hits hits us and grandparents Triggers usually involve him not getting something he really wants (ie frustration) or doing something that he does not want to do but has to (e. How it feels when your toddler literally won’t stop biting other kids at daycare. My boy is about to be 3. Unlikely-Draft. It’s been this way for ten months now. Hi there! Looking for some ideas for my 2-year-old (+3 mos) who is hitting and pushing friends at daycare, and the dog at home, pretty randomly (so, not in response to being angry or frustrated). Hey all, I know there's a bunch of posts about this--but basically here to ask those who HAVE gone through it "does it get better!?" Our toddler (currently almost 2. Getting kicked out of daycare. This hasn't seemed to work and most recently, she will get close to other kids and begin to touch nicely, before scratching. At 27 months he very rarely scratches or hits and the biting has completely stopped. Child 4-9 Years. Our daycare sent a message yesterday to all the parents in my son's class that there were toddlers that were hitting/spitting/wrestling and choking each other. ago. She seems to be ok with other kids and our new born baby and doesn't really hit us, we just not sure what the best plan of actions is. The end result looks the same - he emerges in a state of calm - but the neural processes are very different. We tell them “no hitting” and will hold down their arms down and try to continue snuggling. i’ve tried putting him in timeout, sending incident reports home, and even calling his mom with him sitting right next to me. Some days he is great and other days I work in a daycare and I’m a toddler parent, so I do understand both sides. Toddler. A lot of kids will cry or tantrum after daycare pick up. When he is hitting and throwing things. He is extremely intelligent, and he has never had any health issues. However it shouldn’t be to the point of injuring other kids. Support. We take him to a different place, set him down and ask why he’s doing it/what his I was forwarded a video of a little boy (~4) at daycare hitting my little girl (2) while an older girl (11) egged the whole thing on and filmed it. They’ve been holding it together all day. 16 month old - biting and hitting at daycare Question So we got a note home today that our daughter, age 16 months, was attempting to bite other kids (possibly when they had a toy she wanted or tried to take a toy from her) and throwing her toys in anger. Our 3 year old daughter goes to an amazing preschool This school is welcoming to children with autism which is wonderful. biting, hitting, crying to teacher, etc. In my experience you gotta put in the work to get rid of problematic behavior. 5 and 1, and our oldest had some difficulty with speech but has come a long way over the last 6 months. e. They were like a second family. If she is one of many people the child is biting, then the staff are being negligent. He has always been a more aggressive child. Keep in mind that your little toddler doesn’t have a good handle on empathy, so it’s unlikely they will feel sorry for hurting someone. Many parents find that children who bite miraculously stop when they move to a new setting. I was you a few months ago. IMO, this is a daycare problem not a your kid problem. At 2. Bitting and hitting did occur but they were one off occasions. When mine has done it, a quick "No, we don't hit/bite/headbutt whatever, it hurts", and follow up with "what do you need" afterwards. He also throws his toys and started throwing utensils food and dishes. I totally spiraled. Hitting animals is an entirely normal and expected thing for a toddler to do. Anyway, my cousin called both CPS and police. I have a nephew, 3, who also hits himself. Unless you have other red flags, I really don’t think changing preschools is going to help. He says no. Biting is hugely problematic for other families in the group. At this point we will set them down. My tiny humans are big jerks 🤣. Also a 2 hrs nap window should be exactly that, a child CAN nap then but you can't force a child to sleep, and making a 4 yr old lie quietly is an exercise in frustration for all. Does your toddler hit other kids at the first sign of frustration? Here's how to handle this behavior. It takes one child to hit your kid once for them to do the same. Over the last month and a half, he has started biting incessantly at Daycare. Hello! My 3 year old has been struggling hitting at daycare for the past few months. Mar 27, 2023 · Limited impulse control. Check out Little Big Feelings - they have a toddler course and we used a lot of the techniques from their courses. Reddit has abandoned the users, the moderators, and countless people who support an ecosystem built on Reddit itself. Sometimes it’s that they are relieved to be back with their favorite people. Even if you change to using effective methods at home it probably won’t help the daycare situation. It might help if you can get the supervisor at daycare involved, the supervisor may be competent and be able to straighten out the teacher. Well he has now bitten 3 more times and has been in the class for 3 days total now. Sometimes this is because transitions are hard. • 1 yr. Toddler asked to leave daycare. Once kindergarten hits they will be out of the house for 30+ hours a week for 18 years, enjoy the time while you can. OPs child, or any child in the same situation, shouldn’t have to deal with violence being directed at them. They say she goes to a “friend” and hits them, pulls them, etc. If your sweet little toddler suddenly hauls off and hits you in the face you are likely to have questions. That could potentially be 2 sets of eyes away from the kids now. My son (23 months) has been going to the same daycare since he was 5 months old. My toddler hitting me is escalating. Advice. 17. It’s the age group and the biter is THE BITER. Either way, they are understaffed for this situation because it shouldn't be hard to keep one child under control in a 4-1 environment. Hitting is a very normal developmentally stage around this age. Toddlers are notorious for fighting when they’re in groups. Our oldest has been a near perfect child till about 3 months ago when he started to have violent outbursts. 3. Initially it was hard but now she loves it. Recently he’s started to hit me severely over every little thing. 5 year old is asking him if he likes it when other kids push or hit him at daycare, activities, etc. It seems like she likes to see the other child's reaction. Obviously he has not picked that up from home and I’m upset and embarrassed and don’t know what to do about it. I’m not sure if anyone on here has dealt with this before. And put her down take a few steps away. Holding his hands when he hits and saying calmly the same lines: “Hitting is not allowed. The little boy was hitting my girl, and another little boy while they were sitting down and watching TV. i’m not allowed to put him in Last two days he has been hitting himself a lot. We’ve tried playing his favorite songs. Let’s dissect this sentence a little. This happens most times I tell Our 16 month old thinks hitting is very funny- we tell her “ ow No Hitting!”. He goes to an at home daycare with at least 7 kids a day (including 3 of her own) and she's the only provider. I do think the books helped “hands are not for hitting” and “what to do when you feel like hitting” are two Behavior changes at daycare. mkane2958 • 1 yr. I’m about to make him wear a helmet. If she is being bit by the same person, she is being targeted and should be protected. 2-3 YO hitting at daycare My children go to daycare and there is a little girl between 2-3, who is very handsy. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. My son is 2. The 22 month old in your son's class may just have gotten there a bit early. He has been real silly lately and thinks it’s funny to do something he isn’t supposed to do. (Luckily he doesn't like it and gets really upset if someone pushes him. This kid likely needs some kind of behavioral services at home and they should be intervening with this kid's parents. He will hit, pinch, and occasionally bite. He thinks it’s funny and playful to hit. So my toddler decided that hitting people unprovoked is his next phase! Today at daycare he decided to hit his classmates several times (idk why) but I’m very embarrassed that he’s doing it. We’ve tried giving him toys for comfort. Consistency is key, and time outs aren't age appropriate for toddlers. brush teeth, bathe) Our newly 3 year old son has started tantruming more and has resorted to hitting and throwing toys when upset. I reported a coworker at the daycare I work at for hitting a toddler and she’s still working because we are short staffed I started working at a daycare about a month ago and I witnessed my lead teacher in the one year olds class room strike a kid over the head with a block three times because he was hitting another kid. My family moved states over the summer and in the process my two boys (4 and 3) changed daycares. Biting is as natural to a toddler as hitting, they don’t discern the two actions of one being worse than the other - so while no one wants to see their child getting hurt at school, especially bitten, it’s not an unusual event. 2. She’s being going to this pricy daycare from May 2023. We've tried explaining that it hurts. Frustration with peers. Hitting at daycare is best addressed in real-time at daycare. You don't expect a child to sit and color quietly for 2-3hrs. It’s mostly all due to moving and playing at 100% speed all the time and just not having total body control. Our pediatrician thinks it is normal, and suggests we redirect her every time she is about to hit, and praise when she uses gentle hands. It’s not good for her or anyone else. He has also been acting out at home a lot more lately. Before then we supervised very closely and moved either child or cat if hitting happened or was about to happen. true. The note was addressed to all the parents and asked how we handle these things at home and for us to Baby girl likes it so far but still hitting. I am very concerned about her being expelled from the daycare and spent my whole night googling about toddler hitting. I am so sad to hear and see the aggression that my 2. she will randomly walk up to a another child and hit, pull and grab for no reason. I’m a FTM here. The teacher hit the child. The first incident literally happened the day he had his dental check-up (3/1/21) and we were informed that his back molars were coming in. In our daycare, its in the admission paperwork, that a child with a pattern of biting will not be allowed to continue coming there. Hey all! My 23 month old has picked up a bad habit. Yeah, honestly OP is probably better off that their kid isn't going to that daycare anymore. As children age, they need less sleep and yes it doesn't help that she has a new sibling. It took about 3 weeks for us for the behavior to totally stop, so hang in there. I'd suggest taking him to the park before daycare for an hour, or walking him to daycare -- whatever you have to do to make him more active. You would never expect a 3yo child to sit quietly through a 2-3hr circle time. I have been getting oh-no report for my two year old from her daycare every day since last 4-5 days. My wife passed away back in December of 2021 when my son was 3 and we lived out of state. We are using gentle parenting methods and sometimes they work but we’ve had some hour-long epic meltdowns. They say it seems like she might be bored and looking for a reaction. 1. Then he started hitting my face because he though my reaction was funny. Fingers crossed that will be the case for you. But they pull their arms away and continue to hit. We just grab his hands and tell him not to do that and explain why. This ain't gonna fly when homie is 3 sheets to the wind in tantrum town. We’ve tried greeting him with snacks. She’s been hitting and her parents apologized profusely but between them and the sitter they are unsure how to address it. My older three, all boys who wrestle constantly, never had this issue. * If they can’t prevent that from happening while teaching the kids ‘gentle hands’ they need to either rehome the animals to a safe space or quit being a daycare. I asked the daycare provider about this and she said that my daughter has hit the other kids a couple times here and there, mainly in disputes around sharing toys, but not any more than would be considered normal. If she hits back, the only thing that will happen is she will get in trouble too. He normally loves it, happily runs in and is all smiles when I pick him up. In a large majority of situations, the child calms down within 10 minutes of the parent leaving and has a fun time the rest of the day. I have 4 kids. This week, out of nowhere, he is suddenly bawling his eyes out and screaming hysterically when I drop him off in the mornings. Toddler 1-3 Years. one of the kids (m2) constantly hits me and surprisingly he hits really hard. Toddler 1-3 Years I’ll start off by saying that yea our 20 month old had a biting issue at daycare. Your child is 4 and should not have to stand up for herself. kgee1206. When hitting stopped I repeated myself. The hitting at daycare likely needs to be addressed in real-time by a competent teacher. Never. I have seen this many many MANY times. I would ask if it’s like head banging repeatedly or more of an accident type hit. 12. He started hitting at 22ish months old and turned 3 Posted by u/wanderluster-21 - 1 vote and 6 comments Biting is very common and developmentally appropriate in the under 3s crowd, it happens at every daycare that doesn't unfairly expel kids. He will literally slap me in the face over and over or bite me until I remove myself from him. If the problem escalates at daycare then get a supervisor to review what the teachers are doing to make sure they are using effective methods. Reply. A couple of weeks ago I came on here looking for advice regarding my 2yo son hitting in daycare. I'd get reports daily where he would kick during quiet time constantly or he would hit unprovoked or throw toys. someone took her toy (or hit/pushed her) and she bit in retaliation. He just turned two years old, please I’m desperate for advice on how to handle this. At home, if my son is upset he will swat me. pp wq fq sp vg fg da bz mc lc