My sister takes my stuff without asking

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If that's the case, stop giving her a reaction and ignore it. Meanwhile she always goes into my room and takes my stuff without asking for permission. belongings. My mother often has valid reasons for being in the house, but this has not been an issue recently. My mom was Jun 1, 2011 路 My grandmother in law went into the nursing home recently. UM HELLO I am an adult now. my sister takes my stuff without asking and calls me greedy if I don’t let her. The fact I was trying to leave scared him enough that he did change after that. Teach them to ask for what they would like to have. My mother brought up how my sister's belongings impede us when we try to clean, she moved out she needs to take her stuff, and we already care for her dog. She wears them and throws them on the floor and they become all wrinkled. One time he gave away a 15+ year bottle of white wine to a family friend without telling my mom or I. We live with our parents and I am already working while she's still a student. Shes taken every set of headphones i've ever bought, despite If your younger child has been taking things, focus on teaching them the skills of sharing. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver I ALWAYS leave my ps4 on rest mode (little orange light is always on) and when I came back, it was off. Siblings take stuff from each other all the time. My best friend (lets call her Kathrine) has been staying at my place 1-2 times every week for the last year, because her place… We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. She slips up, sometimes playing with stuff she's not supposed to or even picking things up to give them to their owner (despite the fact that it was fine where it was 馃槄), but she's still young so I don't expect perfection. She complained about every single thing she had to buy for us. She has a history of mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety (she no longer takes meds) and is diagnosed with ADHD. My husband is 72. I think you just might need to have a basic convo about boundaries of your property. Edit 1: my sister is the same size as me, not the other way around. I (16f) have a younger sister (14f) and she steals everything of mine, makeup, clothes, underwear, shoes, EVERYTHING. (Apologies for this very mundane question I just need help with this) My sister will occasionally come into my room and ask for items such as tools or my charger etc. She takes my stuff without asking but when I do the same she looses her mind. She gets a really nasty attitude when i politely ask her not to take my stuff without asking. She also does this with my hair ties and clips. Me: No, it’s not! Wait, it’s okay for me to feel frustrated but not okay for you to take my things. Things like plates, silverware, kitchen equipment etc. original sound - Lauren O’Connell. Apr 8, 2024 路 My reaction when my sister takes my clothes without asking @beginsisters Mar 31, 2021 路 Talk to an attorney who specializes in probate law and guardianship. @kidvisions Said. My house is more cluttered. She really doesn't have any legal responsibility towards you, according to what I'm reading. My younger sister (18) and I (20) used to share clothes all the time without hesitation. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I hate her. My stuff is then lost. Hi, So I’m a ‘recent graduate’ living at home with my parents in the Midwest to save money. I can't do anything without her judging me. There are several grounds upon which a Will can be invalidated. Food, clothes, medical expenses, toys, laptops and phones Here’s a copy of my previous post about this. My Classmate doesn't ask any thing, whatever it maybe like books, pendrive etc. Borba explains: GREEN: “If your teenager says, ‘Hey, mom, I’m going next door,’ you can respond with: ‘Great, thanks for telling me I removed items from parent’s house after they died; these items belonged to me while I was living there now my sister who is the executor of will threatened to have me arrested. Now it’s not like she’s just stealing my clothing, it’s way worse than that because she will take anything she wants to use. she’s probably 4’5-4’7, and around the same weight. Posted by u/nathenmardybum - 1,078 votes and 190 comments Ywa op nta. Our lease is up in about six weeks, but we are parting ways it's up. PS - My daughter is now 22 and would NOW never We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. And your husband should have your back. When your child gets to be a little older, you need to coach them to say, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have taken that without asking. Since I am an older sister, I am used to letting her borrow my stuff but it's been too much for the past couple of years and I am fed up. scapegoating, or blaming you when things go wrong. ) but i seldom borrow from her as i have my own. They will help you understand your options and the evidence you will need to collect if you suspect financial abuse. Award. r/raisedbynarcissists. She is also a big thief, she would take whatever she likes from my stuff without asking for permission, even if I need them at that time. only when it’s an emergency or sth then i’ll ask for her permission. She finally moved places recently and texted me 4 days before moving saying she packed my stuff into boxes and labeled them and I should come by and get them. Apr 2, 2012 路 Stealing from family can be an outcome of envy— jealousy of a more favored sibling who seems to be given more. Collect documentation. If she is still desrespectful, tell her that you will do just that if she takes your things again without asking first, and respecting your things. The answer to your question is no, neither your brother, you, or anyone else is legally permitted to simply take a decedent's personal possessions or other assets after his death. When I told her she shouldn't have taken it she made it her mission to take my stuff without asking and rarely had any consequences for it because I was told to share. If your parents tell you no say this is the only way to stop you from complaining constantly about her, and offer to give them a copy of the key. I'm not finna respect someone who always takes my stuff without asking. Still manipulative and abusive but not violent. Before you take legal steps or confront family members, obtain evidence of financial mishandling or other abuse. I couldnt take mine with me when i joined the military. I bring it every day for around a month and he keeps asking me, one day he just walks up and takes it from me. Ask her how she would feel if you "borrowed" her ipod , computer or whatever and listen to her answer. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 1 not wanting my mom to take my stuff 2 im being selfish for not wanting to give my sister a soda. After two days she returned it. "Roommate used my toothbrush" (which she wouldn't do but hypothetically) then tables would get flipped and beat downs would occur. One time… my sister is generous with her stuff (clothes/makeup etc. I have a good relationship with my brother or try to but the more time we spend together, the more gruelling this is becoming. ) My brother not having to care for another person or even his younger sister too, has in my eyes, resulted in him being selfish, feeling entitled, not having much respect for others time or money etc. But no use. Mar 5, 2018 路 How to handle a teen’s statement of intent—rather than their request for permission—depends on what they’re planning to do. Now, she has a boyfriend of 10 months that has lived with us in our family home for around the last 7-8 months now. My sister recently came into my room and started rummaging through my shit looking for my keys and when I told her to leave she yelled at me to give them to her and I refused. She will enter my room go through my stuff, use it without asking and then never puts it back. So she not only pressured you to take her, she promised her that you would take her in order to force your hand. My parents always say "respect your elders" which is so annoying . Last time, she was sitting on my desk and she left marks all over my desk using my new highlighters. My dad has the bad habit of giving away things without asking permission. I don’t really know if it’s normal that I get really hurt and annoyed when people (my sister) touch my stuff. My response to Callahan taking my stuff is sometimes yelling at her. This is a support group for people raised by abusive parents (with toxic, self-absorbed or abusive personality traits, which may be exhibited by those who suffer from cluster B personality disorders). You might also put in a “lead time” requirement — don’t ask for my red tank top at 6 a. Like I hold the smallest things dear to me. Died a few years later. I dont rlly mind them using my makeup, I would actually love to teach them. She also talks shit about me to every family member. Keep the lines of communication open. Everybody has issues that they run into, and… My (24F) sister (21F) likes to use my stuff whether it be makeup, skincare, clothes, perfume, shoes and other things. Disrespectful, controlling and down right rude. She says yes and gives it back to me without saying thank you or sorry for not letting me know she took it even though I needed it. NTA. •. She looked at me with daggers in her eyes and put her fork and knife down and said, "You know, I really I’ve tried telling her to stop taking my stuff, I’ve gotten physical with her, and I’ve brought it up with my dad. Definitely draw boundaries, but know they won't always be 100% followed and you will just have to learn to live with it. Mar 8, 2012 路 8 Mar 12. For the past ten months, I've been living with my roommate and her two dogs. My mother lets it slide but whenever she takes my car out I worry. I'd like to share my story as well. when I’m half-asleep and you need to leave in 20 minutes. My sister claimed to be using it but i found it under her bed. You should be allowed to have stuff that is YOURS, especially if you bought it yourself. Sep 2, 2019 路 Now, it’s also possible that even with your over-validation, your sister will continue to incessantly complain. Hi, r/relationships! It's great to see you, just not necessarily under these circumstances. Your sister isn't entitled to your stuff just because you live together, and your mom siding with your sister is just enabling your sister's sense of entitlement. To start off, Tiffany's room is a complete mess and she hoards stuff. she has a stable life, a good income and her own place. or sometimes she asks but even if i said no she goes ahead and does it anyway Somethings that puts me in the state of anger and triggers me is when my sister takes my stuff without asking. When you devote a lot of time to performing favors for your family members, you tend to lose focus on yourself. They may get mad for a little while, but eventually, they will learn to respect your time and energy. I have asked people about it and they say it is normal (not that I disagree as I used to take my older sisters stuff but it was not the same, i didnt lie and i would always give it back). she has no need for whatever she takes, and it’s getting We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. It can be a lack of impulse control driven by unbridled want. The most frustrating thing that she does is borrow bras, which is super weird because we're different sizes and she stretches the Jun 18, 2013 路 And be willing to respect “no” if that’s the answer. My 12 yr old sister has a problem with getting into me and her other sisters… Apr 8, 2024 路 My reaction when my sister takes my clothes without asking @beginsisters Yes, your sister can require you to use your own money for essential items. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver When I was 16 I packed my stuff to move out when my dad was supposed to be out until very late but he came home early and caught me. My sister brought up all the stuff she does for us (drives us to the grocery store and helps pay the mortgage). This is a ridiculous thing for your MIL to do. That way, whenever you are not home you can lock your door and she can’t steal your stuff. Lately I’ve noticed my parents treating my sister differently than me. Ask him if he would want you to throw out his stuff, without asking him first. The first time, they were really confused, asking if anyone had seen their stuff, finally, they came to me and I just gave them what they asked for without argument. It might go like this: “You My sister keeps taking my stuff without telling me and she doesn’t even take care of them. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. He does NOT throw my stuff away. Everyone and a while I will ask her for help on my homework but she won't want to help me after 23 votes, 24 comments. She also wants me to help her out with stuff but she doesn't help me. put-downs, insults Apr 18, 2011 路 Perhaps she has never really thought about it. m. 'Cleaning up' someone else's house without their permission, and throwing away things, after being asked not to, is a violation of personal boundaries. . Have a family meeting. It's a way to establishing control over a territory, namely your house. Edit 2: I don’t want to wear my The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver NTA. I let her use my Expand user menu Open settings menu. • You’re entitled to have some “off-limits” items. Wrap the chain round the thinner bit at the rear of the wardrobe door handles, pull it tight, and then put on the padlock to keep it that way. I don’t know if I’m being petty but this is getting ridiculous. If you had given in, your mother would have used you more and more as free care for your sister. I live with my parents and my 17 year old sister. So i did. I used to share an apt with my sister for 2 years. 2. The next morning I wake up and I ask my sister if she took my charger. She has always been pretty entitled and had a pretty normal childhood (parents together, one brother, comfortable living) but since I am adopted I was brought up a bit differently so sometimes we clash cause she doesn’t understand where I’m coming from. I never do this to her stuff and I was taught to always ask no matter what. Jul 11, 2016 路 18. Dr. Which is perfectly fine as I have given her permission to take them the issue is that she never gives the stuff So my sisters did not take that note seriously and continued to leave stuff on the counter, so I just took it and kept it in my room. Like "roommate used my pan without asking" as long as the pan wasn't damaged or left super dirty it's fine. I bring home 2400 a month after taxes and put half of everything into savings each month. Oct 19, 2022 路 BadGranny · 19/10/2022 20:30. “It’s almost a green light, yellow light, red light thing. Feb 6, 2024 路 It could help your friend to think of other ways to handle her needs. Likewise, I work and don't ask my parents for money, whereas she gets them to pay for most things. He is a “minimalist”. TLDR: Older sister is suddenly asking me to pay her back for my 1 year stay at her home during the pandemic, expects me to pay everything upfront or she will revoke my car. Whenever I tell my mother abt something she does, she says that she doesn't wanna hear it. "Roommate used the last of my eggs and wont replace them The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver Aug 1, 2019 路 Tell them nicely yet firmly that you are not comfortable helping in this way anymore. Don't give your friend the "silent treatment," hoping that he will figure out what's wrong. Jul 11, 2016. Its called respect for other people and if he refuses to ask you first, then he has no respect for you or your belongings. TL;DR my sister uses my stuff without permission every time she comes to stay when she knows I have to be careful of germs because of working for a disability employment service. Craig recommends starting small, asking them to start with one session. But if this is really upsetting you, then ask her nicely to leave your stuff and not to even go into your room, without your permission. It is important to learn how to put your I [17F] have an older sister [21F] (let's call her Tiffany), and I can tell she's going through something. I’m fed up with it at this point. I usually lock it away, but rn I'm on a vacation with family and I'm sharing the same room, bedroom, closet So I cant rlly hide it from them. she is younger than me but she is old enough to know that 15 votes, 21 comments. Our household always revolved around money, even though my mom made more than enough money and we were not struggling by any means. Other than that, this behavior will probably never fully stop. For example my sister took my calculator without asking me and I just feel disrespected and emotional. Your sister sounds a lot like my younger sister, who constantly borrows clothes, books and makeup without asking. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Is this legal? She has a will but we are being told it is no good in this situation. Exactly. She can just walk into my room whenever she pleases and take my clothes but it’s not visa versa because I cannot just walk into her room Kind of depends on the stuff and the situation. Please share your stories, your questions, your histories, your fears and your triumphs. 3. My sister and i both had baby blankets we kept as kids. She has 4 living children and 2 of them went into her apartment and took all of her things and sold some of them without her knowledge. Everything. She and only she is the one who hurt your sister. Once she took my pendrive without my permission. I'm not talking about her borrowing my clothes or using my lipgloss without asking, she actually takes things and claim it as her own, saying I either gave it to her or she bought it herself. Nov 2, 2009 路 Generally everybody hate that type of people. I also found one of her face masks on my side of the room which is really odd. Talk with your friend as you normally do, even if you're having a problem with him borrowing your things. But with the same type of stuff. Trusts Attorney serving Idaho Falls, ID at John Simmons. This often happens when a sibling feels that their brother or sister manipulated the deceased parent into changing the Will. I assume that is because she hasn't died. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to… 941K subscribers in the Advice community. Really, it’s okay. In my sense i doesn't allow that type of persons. I started searching for that. She's been doing this for quite some time and it's really frustrating. Yes, you may remove YOUR items. It frustrates me when you take my things instead of going to the supply closet. Source: oldest out of 4. The entire table was silent and watching me chew and I felt so awkward right after I did it. I ask for it back and of course he just says he wants to see how it turns and get his finger alllllllll over it I keep asking for it but he says no, eventually he gives it back and I have to get a clothe and hand sanitizer before its When people touch your stuff. I've seen a lot of posts here regarding parents either throwing away or giving away possessions without asking permission. He would ask if he thought something needed to go. Posted by u/altosaxplaya13 - 25 votes and 17 comments I(17f) have a younger sister(14f) who will consistently take my things, at least 5 times a week I’ll catch her with something of mine. In this case, the sibling can file a lawsuit that claims the Will is invalid. S. For as long as i can remember my sister has eaten the food i tell her not to bc its mine, used my stuff when i specifically told her not too, and frequently doesnt take care of the stuff she takes and breaks it. Help keep the sub engaging! I (19F) live with my (18F), bit of context to the situation: My sister takes my clothes, jewelry and skincare items often and usually doesn’t ask when doing so, I tend to try to avoid conflict with her because she can get very toxic quickly (I’m no angel either but in this situation it’s completely different). She constantly takes my mothers car, and my car without asking me and runs my gas dry. Jan 15, 2022 路 My husband is a tosser; I take a more measured approach. Log In / Sign Up ADMIN MOD. I got married and moved out but due to space issues had some of my stuff at the old place. It is driving me insane. May 13, 2023 路 It all started with her taking my favorite plush animal without permission and ruining it (the eyes were gone and it got soaked which ruined the color). I don’t know what to say to her but it makes me madly uncomfortable to know she was using my stuff without asking first AND while I was gone. Apr 26, 2024 路 Once you have a therapist lined up, you can ask your sibling if they would be open to coming to therapy with you. So it’s been about 7 years of putting up with my (26f) sister in law (27) stealing my stuff and either throwing it away or breaking it or ruining it just not taking care of it period by the time I get it back, she never admits she took it. then basically anything in your room was yours and others couldn’t use it without permission or anything with your name on it. My younger sister takes my clothes then Feb 16, 2013 路 Tree at Floydgirrl's Window, #2 Feb 16, 2013 @ 14:35:21. My almost 4 year old can (mostly) understand not to touch things like phones, laptops, my switch, etc without asking. Archived post. I know its annoying when people mess with your stuff, but siblings always It turned into a screaming match between the two. Okay so i'm 21, about 3 months unemployed, and in school full time. All you need is a length of chain and a padlock. Go to the store and get a new door knob for your room that locks with a key form the outside. Here are some examples: 1) He throws perfectly usable items into the trash rather than donating them, mostly because of the time involved. my parents take her side, but I feel that it’s unfair that I have to give up whatever it is she wants to take because she feels like she can. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. If the chain is short enough, she won’t be able to pull it over the door knobs to open the doors. “One I announce to the table, "Okay, I can't stand this anymore," and I reached over and I stabbed her plantain with my fork and shoved it into my mouth. Hoped this helped. I have to rearrange everything back to how it was before and clean it all thoroughly whenever anyone does that. simply let him know that you do not apprieciate it when he throws out yuor stuff. 15M subscribers in the AmItheAsshole community. If this dont work, buy her some makeup for Xmas or her birthday, then tell her, now you have no reason to use mine. Never asked and if confronted after would have the nerve to say "I didn't ask because you'd just say no" which was just mind boggling to me because if you know I'm probably going to say no and that I don't want to lend it out how does that in any way excuse stealing it. I’m around 5’2, 150 lbs. I've suffered with OCD for years, but something I've noticed in particular that always gets to me is when other people move, or take, my things without my permission. Sister takes my stuff and never gives it back or loses it entirely. However, your brother, as the guardian, needs to supplement some (BUT NOT ALL) of the money that your sister spends on you. (So are your kids — from their siblings and also from Mom and Dad. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver Posted by u/hailthepotatoqueen - 846 votes and 99 comments Polenicus. #1. It is possible for a sibling to sue for inheritance. Her: Good, I’m glad we’re both okay with this. Mar 8, 2013 路 Me: No, it’s not. 26 Likes, TikTok video from Lauren O’Connell (@lollyalexandra): "POV: your sister takes your favorite shirt without asking #hamilton #hamiltonmusical". In that case, you can set a compassionate boundary. Hello guys, my sister is the biggest liar I have ever met in my whole life. She just called me a spoiled selfish child. It just pisses me off. Ever since I got my first job my older sister has been randomly asking me to get my nephew gifts. Her: It’s okay for you to feel that way. She also takes my pens and highlighter. My dad told me to take it as it was mine and he would handle her. Usually it’s clothes. Because there is a reason, i had bad experience. So I went mad at her because she can’t just take my stuff without asking me. My mom invoiced me and my sister for the expenses of raising us. My sister (20) and I (19) get along like most typical sisters do. It’s your house and Help. ”. I haven’t been diagnosed and maybe this doesn’t Your mother wanted these days free from your sister. This is a place where you can ask for advice on many subjects. Jul 21, 2020 路 Aggressive manipulation tends to involve more obvious attempts to control your behavior, including: shaming or mocking you. When i came home to visit with my husband several years later, i wanted my blanket. It can be a call for I am a 17-year-old girl with a 19-year-old sister who keeps taking things from me. My [26F] roommate [25F] keeps on taking my stuff without asking, and I've had it. Your brother has the most amount of responsibility Nov 21, 2012 路 My condolences on the loss of your father and on the additional grief your brother's actions are causing you. And teach them to take turns. I just hate it when people use my stuff 1) without asking me 2) without putting it back (like most people im pretty sure). My sister is 4 years younger than me and would just take my stuff all the time when she was in high school. ty rr zv hx bf vx dn ry ie up